Wanting

One of my friends took her driving test without telling anybody. Not her friends, not her boyfriend, not, I think, even her driving instructor. The first thing that anybody else knew of it was when she came in and announced that she'd passed her driving test. This made an awful lot of sense to me. I am often reluctant to admit to anybody how much I want certain things. (Last year it was a job, and then a different job. Today it is a house. I really, really want the house we saw today, and there is a strong possibility that we will not get it.)

If I do not get that thing, I will be sad.

If I have told somebody else how much I want that thing, they will be hoping I get it. If I don't get it, they will be disappointed for me.

I don't want to have to deal with their disappointment as well as my own. At the same time, I appreciate the support.

Is there something here about mixing up being disappointed for and disappointed in? Letting people down? Owing them something?

I need to prod this some more, I think.